I have always had a hard time with the saying "God is in control."
A few months ago I had a conversation with a young man, who had dealt with issues I wouldn't have imagined, experienced things most people won't talk about, and arrived at a place of brokenness foreign to most broken people.
I looked sheltered, protected, and pampered, even to myself. I was almost afraid to speak for fear of saying something like, "God is in control." I put myself in his shoes, or at least I tried, and realized that those words that are meant to be a comfort would only be an insult to a hurting heart, even one that trusted Him.
That night I read a story about a Rwandan woman whose son was killed during the Rwandan genocide, and how she faced his killer. Forgave his killer. And blessed his killer.
I put myself in her shoes, or at least tried to, and realized that though she trusted God, (unlike the aforementioned man) to say, "God is in control," would be nothing more than empty words, echoing in the mind of a person trying desperately to cling to something with meaning.
The next morning my dad got violently sick, and although I was concerned about him, I didn't realize til later he thought he wasn't going to make it. It awoke to me again the reality that I try not to think about, that my family consists of mortals, and eventually, someone I really love will die. I put myself in that place, and realized that though I would cling to Christ with everything I am, if someone told me, "God is in control," I would have a hard time not becoming angry with them.
“I have heard many such things; Miserable comforters are you all! Shall words of wind have an end? Or what provokes you that you answer? I also could speak as you do, If your soul were in my soul’s place. I could heap up words against you, And shake my head at you; (Job 16:2-4)
I read a book shortly thereafter called Making Sense Out of Suffering, and an article about the Armenian genocide, and I just find myself thinking, what is it about the phrase that I hate so much? It doesn't seem to comfort, though it should, it doesn't even seem to convict, though I would expect it to.
Do I not believe it? Am I actually so faithless that I cannot find comfort in God's sovereignty?
But then I realized that the word control implies initiative.
You can't be given control over a situation, nor can you just have it, control is taken.
Authority is different.
I was at McDonalds one time, (where I work) and my coworker paid an order out wrong. My manager had authority over the situation, but I was the one who took control and told my coworker how to handle it. Together we solved the problem, and the manager didn't even have to get involved.
If, when my coworker had started to freak out about it, I had said, "Don't worry, Manager S. is in control," this would not have comforted, since she barely seemed to be aware of the issue, much less doing anything about it. She certainly had the authority to step in and take charge, but she didn't, and it would have been useless to try to be comforted by the thought.
When a Team Leader is promoted to a Manager, they are given new authority in their workplace. They are not given control. You might say they are given the authority to take control.
Once given authority, an insecure manager might take control in every situation, but a discerning manager will, more often than not, equip people to handle hard situations by themselves.
I think the reason "God is in control," feels like such an insult both to suffering and to faith, is because it seems to say that God orchestrated every tragedy that occurs, and somehow had a hand in bringing about horrific pain.
Does it seem good to You that You should oppress, That You should despise the work of Your hands, And smile on the counsel of the wicked? (Job 10:3)
It is not God's way to give His people the ability to will and act, and then control their lives.
So no, I suppose you could say that I don't believe God is in control. But only because I do not believe He always takes control.
God is not insecure, nor power hungry, nor uncaring. Like a good manager He stands close by, ready at a moment's notice to assist, but also like a good manager He teaches rather than takes over.
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. (James 1:5)
He may let us be pushed further than we think we can bear, but (unlike a McDonalds manager) He made us, and so knows much better than we how much we can take.
For You, O God, have tested us; You have refined us as silver is refined. You brought us into the net; You laid affliction on our backs. You have caused men to ride over our heads; We went through fire and through water; But You brought us out to rich fulfillment. (Psalm 66:10-12)
But that too is a hard thing to hear when life seems to have fallen apart. "He will not give you more than you can bear." It sounds more hopeful than truthful, and we're actually pretty skeptical creatures when it comes to hope without cause.
The truth behind the hope is not that He has control, but that He has authority, and if He sees that you are pushed too far, stretched too thin, or are falling too deep, He'll be right there to take control until He's satisfied that you can handle it again.
And the Lord said: “I have surely seen the oppression of My people who are in Egypt, and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters, for I know their sorrows. So I have come down to deliver them out of the hand of the Egyptians, and to bring them up from that land to a good and large land..." (Exodus 3:7-8a)
Dispair and blame come with the assurance that God is in control.
Comfort comes with the assurance that God is present, and He has authority.
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1)
Of course, this is my interpretation of the bible and what I have seen and experienced. If you have a different point of view, I'd love to hear it!
As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend. (Proverbs 27:17)
