An Analogy on a Sunday Morning

Thank the Lord for analogies! I think so much in allegory, that if God didn't speak in analogies I don't think I would be able to understand most of what He says. That said, I want to share with you an analogy I thought about this morning.

I love ballet, but ballet is hard work. Being able to dance for me, means at least two hours, (if I don't have more time to devote than that) every day, six days a week, strengthening and stretching muscles, and even training myself to breathe differently.

Sometimes I don't like it very much. Recently I told my teacher about this subconscious trick I had taught myself, where every time I finished an excercise, I told myself, "Oh sweet, I get a little break!" When I got a water break, when it was time to stretch, when I had a moment to listen to correction, all of these came as exciting things because they were all "little breaks."

My teacher, a little amused and very confused asked, "If you get through the entire class by telling yourself that you are having a break...why do you even put yourself through it?"

It did seem a little odd, when I thought about it that way. The truth though, was that I love ballet. Sometimes I go through periods of time when I don't like it very much, but I know that these times pass. When I don't feel like exerting myself, it is discipline, as a result of passion, that keeps me working at it, and when I come to remember why I loved it, I am better able to do it because I kept going in spite of myself.

To jump topics just for a minute, the weather here in southern Ontario has been pretty awful since yesterday, and this morning our church service was actually cancelled.

I slept in, had a nice relaxed morning, but then I was thinking about what to do with my day, and the idea that I could just spend it with Jesus wouldn't leave my mind.

The problem was... Spending the day with Jesus is awesome, but it does take work. It takes discipline. Because it means reading the bible and actively thinking about what you've read. It means praying, even if you don't feel like He is listening, or if you can't keep your attention focused. It means when you feel like you should move onto something else because you've been "spending time with Jesus," for a while already, not moving on. It means staying. "Abiding in the Vine," if you will, even when you feel like you're being pulled off of it.

I just didn't know if I was ready for that kind of work.

I'm just going to take a moment to say, I am so glad I don't have a reputation to uphold! Sometimes I don't want to be honest about the things that I think because I look like a bad Christian, but isn't it a relief that we are all bad Christians? That the status "Christian," actually is NOT dependant on us, but 100% dependant on God? I don't have to be fake with Jesus, because for my failures He was willing to die, which means I don't have to be fake with you, my brothers and sisters in Christ.

Anyway, so as I struggled with that this morning, my sister came downstairs with her laptop, ready to watch the livestream of our church service, which the pastor and his family did from their living room.

Thank the Lord also for sisters! Here's the thing. (I know I'm all over the place today, forgive me) God did such a good job in creating community. He really knew what He meant when He said it was not good for Adam to be alone, it is not good for any of us to be alone, as we find out very quickly when we are.

Left to my own devices this morning, I probably would be watching Youtube videos and/or sleeping right now, but I was not. Just the sheer accountability of having my sister there, willing to enter into the spirit of worship and submission to God's authority with me, made me enter in as well.

I wrestled a little bit more with thoughts of what to spend time on after the video, and found myself saying, "I don't feel like working at it, I don't feel like a good disciple, I don't feel..."

And suddenly I remembered that when I don't feel like dancing, I go to the barre and I push through. When I am having an off day and I feel like I've lost progress, I push through. Sometimes I give myself some grace, I recognize that it's an off day, but I also recognize that effort must be put in if off days are going to produce better days.

It's the same principle in my spiritual life. It's an off day. That doesn't mean I don't have to work. The work may not seem to produce anything today, but it certainly won't produce anything tomorrow if I don't do it.

If you're in a similar boat today then I hope you join me as I plan to read, I plan to pray, and I plan to accept without reservation the grace that God gives me for the struggle.

Buses and Pie

"Am I waiting for a bus that's never coming?" I sang the echo of the last line of the song I had just made up, as I watched the bus go sailing past me.

The answer to my song was "Yes. You are an idiot."

Before anyone gets alarmed at me speaking of myself in such a harsh manner, calm down! I'm just kidding! I'm not really upset with myself, nor am I questioning my own intellect. I may be questioning my ability to read bus schedules, but at the same time I may also be judging whoever wrote the bus schedule, so it all evens out.

Last week I wrote to you about how my life was pretty quiet. Well this week I am writing about "Fort Erie: The Most Adventurous Time of My Life."

I have never taken a bus before Monday, so I really didn't know what to expect, and was quite nervous, but by the end of the day, I was confident. I still didn't understand the bus schedule, (because it's basically an encrypted treasure map written in Greek) but I knew where my stops were, and what time to get on and off.

The next day my work schedule was off just a little bit. Instead of working 12:30-5, I was working 1-4. So, with my superior knowledge and experience, I sat at the bus stop the next day, and watched as my bus came around the corner, and drove on by. Another lady with me and I stood staring in disbelief, we had been waiting at the wrong stop.

Thankfully my heroic cousin was able to drive me to work, but that still left me uneasy about getting home. Shortly before the end of my shift, I asked one of my managers, (who was the primary reason I got anywhere on Monday) and she said I was right with what I had figured out to get home. So confidently I strode down the street with my coffee and my shoulder bag and waited.

When at long last the time arrived, I watched dismally as it came on the opposite side of the street, and passed me by. Well. Thanks Google.

However, I was not to be beaten! We will just pretend that my texts for help never happened, and I immediately knew the solution. I remembered that yesterday's bus had come at 5:13, and would be coming again, so I waited an hour for that one and took it home. (In reality, Google reminded me about the 5:13 bus. Thanks Google.)

So this morning I decided I would NOT be on the wrong side of the street, I remembered where it had passed me by, and this time it would pass with me on it. As I strode down the street, almost at my stop a full ten minutes before it had come yesterday, I watched it smoothly glide in and out of my view. Really?? Really?

This time my sister drove me to work, with another passenger because a sweet old lady also couldn't read Arabic, and needed to get to Walmart.

Tonight I googled my route again and I feel pretty confident about it. However, I am starting to lose confidence in my confidence. I called the Bus Line, tempted to greet the lady on the phone with, "Hi, it's me again! I still have no idea what I'm doing!" But I decided better of it, and then it turned out to be a wasted temptation anyway, because their business hours end at 5. Go figure.

So tomorrow is a new adventure! But I must say I'm not too worried about it. I have had a surprising lack of anxiety through all of this drama. If you're going to pray for me, don't pray that I would have peace or anything like that, just pray that I get to work on time and learn to read Cantonese.

Update:

I liked the way I ended that post, but I wrote it on Wednesday, so I may as well give you the update now. My bus-riding the next day was indeed successful, and since then, it has gone very well. I now have budding friendships with all of the bus drivers, and the only route I am still guessing on is on Tuesday, but I'm not worried about it. I'm 98.9% sure I know what I'm doing.

Also yes, pie was clickbait again. Hehe. But you may take it as an invitation to bring me some if you want! Maybe some Thanksgiving Pumpkin Pie with Whipped Cream. :)

A Letter to You

Dear friend, I would like to tell you a little bit about my life.    

Sometimes I eat muffins that wonderful ladies buy for me, sometimes I have coffee with my brothers in the Lord, and sometimes I get invited to China. (Though so far, I haven't gone)    

I believe that God has a mission for me wherever I am, though the mission may change with time and location. When I started working at McDonalds, I saw it as a blessing, but I also understood that that was to become my mission field.  

 What this is supposed to look like, I still don't really know. I had an idea for ministry which I tried a few times and would love to keep doing, but it hasn't worked out for a while.   

 In the meantime though, I have noticed God involved in my work in interesting, and really encouraging ways.  

 I told one of my sisters a while ago, I feel almost like there is a little church I am part of at McDonalds. If every Christian customer I'm friends with met together at once, we could have a bible study, or if you will, a little church.  

 I love all of my friends, not just the Christians. There is an Indian man who runs a school in India, he is....I don't think Hindu, but something similar, he always calls me by name and chats with me when he can. There is a French lady and her Muslim friend who come in and talk to me, I was friends with the French one first, and I bonded with her friend over her baby. Communicating on the VERY little English she spoke, with mostly smiles and laughs.  

 I saw a man reading a bible once, and asked him about it. He enthusiastically asked, "Are you a believer?"  

 My sisters and I have since referred to him as "Our brother," and he always calls us "Sister" when he sees us. We are brother and sister in Christ.  

 He sat down and had coffee with me a few days ago on my break, and we had a lovely time discussing the church, spiritual gifts, and the Spirit in general. One thing we talked about was how the Spirit unites us, and somehow, we can connect with each other in ways that most people can't. Even a person he had never seen before, he said, "You are a pastor." And he was. The Spirit unifies us.    

 I can't help but think of every other friend I have a McDonalds, and wish they were brothers and sisters too.  

 I can connect with a sweet old lady because she is a wife and mother, and I would like to have children someday. I can connect with a nice gentleman because he appreciates Fred Astaire the way I do, and I can connect with someone because he went to elementary school with my grandfather, but I cannot connect with any of these dear people because they love the same God.  

 And that is a big deal.  

 Though I've known each of them for a year or less, we have wonderful relationships. Jesus has known them their entire lives, yet still they do not know Him. Thinking about this reminded me of a passage we read in church last Sunday, about the demon possessed man by the tombs.  

  “And those who saw it told them how it happened to him who had been demon-possessed, and about the swine. Then they began to plead with Him to depart from their region. And when He got into the boat, he who had been demon-possessed begged Him that he might be with Him. However, Jesus did not permit him, but said to him, “Go home to your friends, and tell them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He has had compassion on you.” And he departed and began to proclaim in Decapolis all that Jesus had done for him; and all marveled.” (Mark 5:16-20)

  The man who had been healed knew that by Jesus' side was the very best place he could be, so he asked to go with him, but Jesus said no.  

 Jesus knew that the people of that city who begged Him to leave as soon as they saw what He could do, would listen to an ordinary man's testimony more willingly than they would listen to Him, so He sent His new disciple back, and it says that "all marvelled."  

 I hope that this is who I can be to these people. I hope they will listen to the testimony of one of their own, since they would not listen to the One with the power to transform their lives.  

 I think God can do really amazing things at McDonalds in West Windsor. I pray that I would be a part of something great that happens there.  

 Yours sincerely,  

 Keturah


NOTE: I am hoping to go to Mississippi next summer for a dance intensive with Ballet Magnificat! If you would be interested in supporting my trip, please check out my GoFundMe page HERE.

Accidentally Ignoring Jesus

Can anyone hide himself in secret places, So I shall not see him?” says the Lord; “Do I not fill heaven and earth?” says the Lord. (Jeremiah 23:24)

I came across this verse a couple days ago, I really love it.

I had just gotten off of work, and I was sitting in the McDonalds lobby, just reading my bible and sipping my coffee.

After reading a few chapters, I started to notice a few conversations going on around me. Some of it was inspiring, actually, while some of it just made me despair for our generation.

As I listened, I really noticed the contrast of the people in that restaurant.

There I was, a young lady with strong beliefs, sitting, listening. Around me, people talked about success and business, their crushes or lack thereof, and some people just read the newspaper, unaware of the world around them.

I was keenly aware of the other presence in the room, which I'm sure most didn't realize. My Lord who, like me, listened.

That was when I was inspired to find a verse like Jeremiah 23:24, which evidently I did, and that inspiration made me want to blog.

I began to write, when suddenly it dawned on me how silly it was that I was writing about God being WITH us, and I wasn't talking to Him. I wrote that I was possibly the only one in the lobby who had a real relationship with Him, the only one who realized He was there, and what was I doing? Writing.

I apologized, and quickly put away my iPod. The rest of my time waiting for my sister was spent talking with God and enjoying His presence.

I think I need constant reminders that that is so much better in fact than in theory. It was lovely.

So I guess I'll just end by saying, don't just read this and agree with me. Don't just say "Praise the Lord," or write something down when you have an insight. Talk to Jesus! He is always wanting to talk to you.

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me. (Revelation 3:20)