How Sickness Brought Me Back to the Basics

The stomach flu hit our house for the first time this week in a LONG time.

First the youngest, second my sister and brother in-law's whole family minus one, (them and two little kids) then the second youngest, then me, then my older sister, then my dad.

As I write this I am reflecting on the nightI got it, when I started to throw up at 2:00 AM.

I prayed a lot. It was all pretty repetitive, "Dear Jesus, please help." 

I don't even know what I was exactly asking for, because I wasn't expecting Him to take away the sickness.

Just strength, I guess.

My head hit the pillow when I got back from the bathroom, the only thought in my mind was gratefulness.

Not gratefulness that He had made it easier, cause He hadn't. Not gratefulness that I had been given strength, cause I felt really weak. Just gratefulness that He was there.

I could tell He was there, suffering with me in my suffering, being a reassuring presence.

I didn't articulate any thoughts in that moment, but the best way to express what I felt is in the quote by John Newton, "I remember two things very clearly. I am a great sinner and Christ is a great savior."

Grace has been a continuous word in my head.

Christ is full of grace.

Maybe I'm simple-minded or silly because I'm sick. But simple, old Christian phrases sound so wonderful to me right now.

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound.

God is love.

Jesus came to save the lost.

I'm all warm and fuzzy. :)

A Letter to You

Dear friend, I would like to tell you a little bit about my life.    

Sometimes I eat muffins that wonderful ladies buy for me, sometimes I have coffee with my brothers in the Lord, and sometimes I get invited to China. (Though so far, I haven't gone)    

I believe that God has a mission for me wherever I am, though the mission may change with time and location. When I started working at McDonalds, I saw it as a blessing, but I also understood that that was to become my mission field.  

 What this is supposed to look like, I still don't really know. I had an idea for ministry which I tried a few times and would love to keep doing, but it hasn't worked out for a while.   

 In the meantime though, I have noticed God involved in my work in interesting, and really encouraging ways.  

 I told one of my sisters a while ago, I feel almost like there is a little church I am part of at McDonalds. If every Christian customer I'm friends with met together at once, we could have a bible study, or if you will, a little church.  

 I love all of my friends, not just the Christians. There is an Indian man who runs a school in India, he is....I don't think Hindu, but something similar, he always calls me by name and chats with me when he can. There is a French lady and her Muslim friend who come in and talk to me, I was friends with the French one first, and I bonded with her friend over her baby. Communicating on the VERY little English she spoke, with mostly smiles and laughs.  

 I saw a man reading a bible once, and asked him about it. He enthusiastically asked, "Are you a believer?"  

 My sisters and I have since referred to him as "Our brother," and he always calls us "Sister" when he sees us. We are brother and sister in Christ.  

 He sat down and had coffee with me a few days ago on my break, and we had a lovely time discussing the church, spiritual gifts, and the Spirit in general. One thing we talked about was how the Spirit unites us, and somehow, we can connect with each other in ways that most people can't. Even a person he had never seen before, he said, "You are a pastor." And he was. The Spirit unifies us.    

 I can't help but think of every other friend I have a McDonalds, and wish they were brothers and sisters too.  

 I can connect with a sweet old lady because she is a wife and mother, and I would like to have children someday. I can connect with a nice gentleman because he appreciates Fred Astaire the way I do, and I can connect with someone because he went to elementary school with my grandfather, but I cannot connect with any of these dear people because they love the same God.  

 And that is a big deal.  

 Though I've known each of them for a year or less, we have wonderful relationships. Jesus has known them their entire lives, yet still they do not know Him. Thinking about this reminded me of a passage we read in church last Sunday, about the demon possessed man by the tombs.  

  “And those who saw it told them how it happened to him who had been demon-possessed, and about the swine. Then they began to plead with Him to depart from their region. And when He got into the boat, he who had been demon-possessed begged Him that he might be with Him. However, Jesus did not permit him, but said to him, “Go home to your friends, and tell them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He has had compassion on you.” And he departed and began to proclaim in Decapolis all that Jesus had done for him; and all marveled.” (Mark 5:16-20)

  The man who had been healed knew that by Jesus' side was the very best place he could be, so he asked to go with him, but Jesus said no.  

 Jesus knew that the people of that city who begged Him to leave as soon as they saw what He could do, would listen to an ordinary man's testimony more willingly than they would listen to Him, so He sent His new disciple back, and it says that "all marvelled."  

 I hope that this is who I can be to these people. I hope they will listen to the testimony of one of their own, since they would not listen to the One with the power to transform their lives.  

 I think God can do really amazing things at McDonalds in West Windsor. I pray that I would be a part of something great that happens there.  

 Yours sincerely,  

 Keturah


NOTE: I am hoping to go to Mississippi next summer for a dance intensive with Ballet Magnificat! If you would be interested in supporting my trip, please check out my GoFundMe page HERE.

Keturah's Summer: Ballet Magnificat

Hello everyone!

This post is going to be a little different than usual, because I really just want to tell you all about my newest exciting adventure. Or at least, what I hope will be my newest exciting adventure.

You may have heard of a ballet company called Ballet Magnificat. If you haven't, they are America's premiere Christian ballet company. I saw their performance of The Hiding Place once when I was little, and have been inspired by them ever since.

Every year Ballet Mag runs a dance intensive in the summer, they have a 2 week and a 4 week program.

I've set a goal to go next summer.

The company is based in Mississippi, so that is where the intensive will be. The tuition is $1,931 and then there are travel expenses on top of that.

(You can watch a video and find out more about the intensive HERE)

I've tried for the last few years to earn enough money for classes, intensives, and equipment, but I've been finding more and more that this is quite a challenge. To really earn enough money, I would need to stop spending and just save money for at least a year, but I can't afford to lose that time of training.

All of the money I'm making from working is going toward classes for September-June of 2018, so I have to come up with some creative ways to raise money for the Summer Intensive.

One of my ideas is a Gofundme page! Super original, I know. ;)

I had to have a picture for my page, so I took the opportunity to have a little photoshoot just for fun. I thought you might like to see some of the pictures!

I feel like I look like a ballet-modern version of a Jane Austen character.

For all you concerned dancers out there, yes, my pointe shoes are fine.

I'm just going to take this opportunity to promote my brother Jon, he has a juice/smoothie business. He also sells apple cider. Go to the City Market on Walker Road, buy it.

My niece wanted to wear one of my ballet shoes. How could I resist? (She was previously playing with that stick on the ground. She gave that up for the shoe. There's a true dancer at heart right there.)

Anyway, if you'd like to support my trip, please consider donating HERE. :)

Here are a few IQWATWPBFA's: (If Questions Were Asked, These Would Probably Be Frequently Asked)

-What if you don't raise all of the money, or your application is denied, what will happen to the donations you did get?

Good question! If for some reason the trip falls through, the money will still go toward my ballet education. As I mentioned earlier, I have been struggling to just pay for regular classes, so if I can't make the trip to Mississippi, the donations will still be really helpful.

-....I had another question I thought of, but I can't remember now. So if you ask, or if I remember, I'll just update this later.

Even if you don't donate, (I know a lot of you have donated to help me with things before, so I am not expecting anyone to twice) please consider sharing this post, or just my Gofundme link on your Facebook!

Just one last note: Gofundme is a great tool, but it does deduct a small percentage from each donation I receive. If you see me in person semi-regularly, it might be better for you to find a way to get it to me in person, with cash or a cheque.

Thank you in advance for any way you are going to help me out!

~Keturah

Now Let's Pray.

"MY FAIR LADY!!"

The sound of two two-year old singing London Bridges at the top of their lungs in a tune which, (if it could be called a tune) was certainly not London Bridges, threatened to drown out the words I was reading in my book.

Abruptly, Emily interrupted the song and announced, "Now let's pray."

There was silence behind my chair for a moment before she began to say, "Thank you for my God. Thank you for my Jesus. Please help Mama to feel better..." (that part was echoed by Louisa, "Please help Mama to feel better.") "Amen."

I immediately wondered if they understood the power of the words they had just said, or rather, the power of the One they said them to. How much did they understand of what they had just done?

Probably not a lot.

When Jesus calls us to "childlike faith..."

But Jesus called them to Him and said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God. Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.” 

...does He mean the kind of strong, unwavering faith we think of when we think of a child's dependency, or does He perhaps just mean that we come with what we know?

My dad has used this analogy before, that a newborn does not think about trusting his parents. He doesn't consciously depend on them, he just does what he knows, which, at that point in his life, is very little.

Emily and Louisa did what they knew. Does God require more from them?

I can pray for a lot longer than they did. I know a lot of things that God hates that I can pray against, I know a lot of people that God loves who I can pray for, I am aware of a lot of blessings I can thank Him for, but did He want that from my nieces?

Or was He happy with the three things they said? "Thank you for my God. Thank you for my Jesus. Please help Mama to feel better. Amen."

That was what they understood, and that is what they came with.

I confess that sometimes I hesitate to come to Jesus because I feel my lack. My lack of knowledge, lack of love, lack of _____. (you fill in the blank)

It's true that I am lacking, and there is more He wants me to know. He has promised to teach me...

However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come. (John 16:13)

...but before He teaches me, I must come to Him to listen. I must come with what I know, and though it is not perfect faith, He is pleased with it.

Another thing that struck me about Emily's prayer was that she made everything hers.

God wasn't just God, He was "My God."

Jesus wasn't just Jesus, He was "My Jesus."

Is that part of what it means to have childlike faith? Her faith said, "I know this, therefore it's mine."

I can do that too! I know Jesus, therefore He's mine.

I know that God made a way for salvation, therefore it's mine.

But It Was Thou

I've noticed that when I get back from GAP, I stay in "GAP mode," for a long while after.

What this means is that if I see a pinecone, I imagine a pro-choice university student comparing a pre-born child to a pinecone, saying that it isn't a tree just because it came from the tree. My next thought is to agree that a pinecone isn't a tree, and show them why their comparison doesn't work.

This also means that in the McDonalds drive-thru, I stop myself before saying, "Hi there, what do you think about abortion?" to a customer who pulls up to the speaker.

This also means that when I read the bible and look for new angles to see it from, I may read a psalm from the perspective of a pre-born baby.

Before I get into it, I'd like to clarify that I understand that this is completely out of context. However, have you ever read a psalm in a time when you felt distressed, and took those words to heart? That is the way I'm looking at it, only not from my perspective, but hers.

If you would like to experience what almost made me cry, I encourage you to read Psalm 55. I'll cover some of it here, but there's too much to write out the whole chapter.

First, the plea of the baby soon to be killed.

Attend unto me, and hear me: I mourn in my complaint, and make a noise; (Psalms 55:2)

A noise which only God can hear, and tragically, if we could, I think most people would choose not to.

Because of the voice of the enemy, because of the oppression of the wicked: for they cast iniquity upon me, and in wrath they hate me. (Psalms 55:3)

Coming from many pro-choice advocates, babies in the womb sound like villains. They are portrayed like evil parasites that will destroy the lives of their mothers, and MUST be dealt with.

(I am not, in any way, trying to trivialize what a woman goes through with an unplanned pregnancy. I agree that in many cases, it is VERY difficult for her, but in no case will her child ruin her life. Trying to raise a child in difficult circumstances will make her life very difficult, but it is her circumstances that are the problem, not her baby.)

Fearfulness and trembling are come upon me, and horror hath overwhelmed me. And I said, Oh that I had wings like a dove! for then would I fly away, and be at rest. (Psalms 55:5, 6)

What kind of society are we, that if a child could fly away from her mother's womb, she would be safer than if she stayed?

Day and night they go about it upon the walls thereof: mischief also and sorrow are in the midst of it. (Psalms 55:10)

Abortion happens all the time. It excuses mischief, but it also never comes without sorrow.

For every woman that is "relieved" of the burden of her baby, a life is lost, and many women carry guilt and regret for the rest of their lives.

Of any part of this chapter though, this is what broke me the most.

For it was not an enemy that reproached me; then I could have borne it: neither was it he that hated me that did magnify himself against me; then I would have hid myself from him: But it was thou, a man mine equal, my guide, and mine acquaintance. We took sweet counsel together, and walked unto the house of God in company. (Psalms 55:12-14)

Read that two more times. First from the perspective of the baby, and second, from the perspective of the mother.

The child says, "If it was an enemy that threatened me, I could have hidden inside my mother. But it was you, who I should have been able to trust, and I had nowhere to hide."

But women so often are not given an option. Their parents or their boyfriend or their friends convince them it's the right thing to do. Sometimes harshly, but I think a lot of the time, they do it because they truly think it's best for them. And because they understand the intention, they go through with the action, and end up carrying enormous guilt that those people who persuaded them will NEVER understand.

The mother says, "If it was my enemy who told me to kill my baby, I could have stood against him. But it was you, my close friend, who told me it was best for me."

Reading that touched me so deeply.

He hath delivered my soul in peace from the battle that was against me: for there were many with me. (Psalms 55:18)

Many. There were many. There are many. 300 children a day, 3,000 in America.

He says battle, and it is like one. It's bloody, it's dangerous, it's killing. But in this battle, one side is bigger, stronger, and has all the weapons.

He hath put forth his hands against such as be at peace with him: he hath broken his covenant. The words of his mouth were smoother than butter, but war was in his heart: his words were softer than oil, yet were they drawn swords. (Psalms 55:20, 21)

"The words of his mouth were smoother than butter, but war was in his heart."

Soft, nice sounding words like "Choice, planning, healthcare," are used to describe the slaughter of innocent children.

But thou, O God, shalt bring them down into the pit of destruction: bloody and deceitful men shall not live out half their days; but I will trust in thee. (Psalms 55:23)

In the end, I pray that abortionists will be converted. That they will learn what it is to know Christ, but if they don't, God has promised to bring about justice. And He is a righteous Judge.

I just want to finish with a question. If an innocent child asked you to save her life, would you do it?

How about the child who can't ask?

If you are interested in saving babies, check out this link - https://www.endthekilling.ca/summer-internship

After reading that, if you still want to do something, but can't make it for one reason or another, you can contact me either on Facebook or at keturahthomson12@gmail.com, and I'll talk to you about another way you can get involved.

A Man Who Saved His Daughter

I stood next to a large sign portraying an aborted baby this week, and asked a young lady, "What do you think about abortion?"

She stared at the sign for a moment in silence before she met my eyes and said, "I was supposed to be aborted."

Her story, she told me, was that the doctor had told her parents she was going to be born blind, deaf, and unable to walk. She stood before me the picture of health.

She had a brother with athsma and other health conditions, but no doctor told her parents to abort him.

"He had actual health problems, but he wasn't supposed to be aborted and I was."

The ONLY reason she was alive to tell me this was because her father stood in the way, and would not let his wife go through with the abortion.

Her mother later left the three of them, she was only 14 months old when she did, and her father raised them.

What a man. When I think about her story, I can't help but think of what a hero her father was, and how few men there are today willing to do what he did.

The amount of guys I talked to on university campuses and had to explain that they DO have a right to speak up for the children who are being killed, and they don't have to stand by and watch injustice happen in the name of "Women's Rights," is astounding.

One young man I talked to told me that after our conversation, it would be hard to stay pro-life, because once he was back to school and the internet, he would again be bombarded by everyone's pro-choice worldview. 

We started to talk about things he would face. "They'll bring up lots of hard circumstances to justify abortion, they may tell you you don't have a say because you're a man..."

He interrupted me, "They would say that??"

"Yup."

"That's ridiculous!"

He then proceeded to explain to ME why that wasn't a valid argument, and I heartily agreed with him.

Men, don't listen to those who would tell you to back down. You DO have a say. As a man, you have a right, and a responsibility to stand up for the weak and vulnerable, and that includes women and children.

I'm inspired when I work with men doing pro-life activism, and when I hear stories of men like this girl's father, who stood up for his children in the worst of circumstances.

I hope that if there are any guys reading this post, that you can be inspired too, and encouraged to live up to the standards set by courageous men who were not afraid to protect the most vulnerable among us.

Open your mouth for the speechless, In the cause of all who are appointed to die. Open your mouth, judge righteously, And plead the cause of the poor and needy. (Proverbs 31:8, 9)

Be of good courage, and let us be strong for our people and for the cities of our God. And may the Lord do what is good in His sight.” (II Samuel 10:12 NKJV)

Listen! There are Pleas that No One Hears

Years ago, I was in a really bad way. I was struggling with issues that I kept to myself, no one knew. If anyone suspected, they certainly never let on. 

There were a couple times when I felt so overwhelmed and burdened by these struggles, that I almost told someone.

One day I was wrestling with it in my mind and feeling overpowered, I suddenly whispered, "Bethany." (the person wasn't named Bethany, but I'm using that instead of her name) She was busy, she just said, "Hmm?" Without looking at me.

I couldn't tell her! I was shaking with fear, I needed her to understand that I was in trouble, and ask me about it. I desperately wanted her to SEE that I needed to be pried into. But she didn't. In my last attempt at courage, I said her name again, but she looked over sort of exasperatedly, and said, "What?"

"Never mind."

I have learned that in the sea of people who may or may not claim to be fine, there are many with stories that they need to tell, but can't, because no one will listen.

I realized this from my own experience, (as I mentioned) and from a few other things. One of them was working at McDonalds, believe it or not.

Countless people walk up to the counter, or pull up to the drive-thru speaker, and say, "Hi, how are you? I would like..."

"How are you?" Is a meaningless question. Most of us don't even try to answer, because we know our answer won't be heard. EVERYONE says they are good, well, fine, and EVERYONE knows that most of the time it isn't true, but who cares enough to find out the truth?

Who cares enough to find out what I really mean when I say I'm fine?

I know I can't be this for everyone. It's a little hard to have a heart-to-heart in the drive-thru, but I do want to be someone who will learn to recognize the silent pleas in people's words.

In a few short days, I'll be heading off to Florida for the Genocide Awareness Project, (GAP) a week of pro-life activism on university campuses.

Last year I talked with a girl named "Dee." Her name was actually a beautiful name (I think African) which I can pronounce, but I don't dare spell.

She and I talked extensively on the issue, and through science and logic, had to come to agreement time after time throughout our conversation. But no matter how much we agreed on, she COULD not say that in the case of rape, abortion shouldn't be allowed.

Near the end of the conversation, I tried to put into action some training we receive when we do GAP, about listening to people and finding out where they are coming from.

Because I couldn't agree with her intellectually, I decided to find out what was going on with her emotionally. I started by affirming her.

"I'm glad you can sympathize so much with people who go through that, (rape) we need more people with hearts like yours." I told her.

"Yeah. I just feel so bad for them, y'know?" She met my eyes and I'm sure I saw tears glistening in hers.

I was speechless. I knew I had been right, that there was something more there, but I lost all ability to communicate beyond that point. What could I say? What could I ask?

I just looked at her for a few more minutes before she told me she needed to get to class. She hugged me and thanked me for talking with her.

I felt like on the one hand, I had made a friend. On the other hand, I had lost an opportunity. I have, SO many times, had that scene replay in my mind. I can still see the tears that I think were in her eyes as she told me, "I just feel so bad for them, y'know?"

No, I don't know, Dee. What was it you wanted me to know? I'm sorry I was never able to find out.

Part of what I am looking forward to this year at GAP, is hopefully another chance. Another chance to hear what people are saying, and understand something different, because I was willing to listen.

But I think this must mostly be up to God. Though I don't think I made the most of that situation, what I did do, I didn't do on my own, and what more I could have done, I couldn't have done on my own either.

I need my Father, who hears EVERY silent plea, to help me hear and know how to respond.

If you would pray for my trip, pray for these things.

1. That lives would be saved.

2. That lives would be changed.

3. That I would be able to listen, and have the wisdom to know how to respond.